Walk your talk ( OR how to react appropriate to negative feedback)

When we think about business environment and what it takes to enjoy those monday mornings, big part of it takes how do we connect with our co-workers and how we carry out our obligations. 
Speaking about connection, self awareness has a big part in it.  
About 95% of people think they have good self-awareness, whereas only about 10-15%of us actually possess that skill. 
How can we recognize those people? 
Those who know what drives them, know what their passions are and understand the impacts they have on the people around them, are more effective. 

This sounds good in theory , on the other hand, actions speak louder than words. 
1. Learn TRUTH about yourself  and give „loving critic“ 
Of course there's a crisis or a moment of opportunity where you need to listen to the people around you. Maybe you make a giant mistake and you've got to eat crow and come clean, and sort of be vulnerable and courageous. 
The truth is you can’t make an omelette without breaking a few eggs (in addition, things have to be broken if you want better things to come back to you). Not everyone wants best for you,  neither everyone wants worst for you.  

To achieve the best effect, speak up your mind, listen, think and act. When people catch sight of your truthness and sincerity, most of them will start acting back.

2. Motivation 


ASK YOURSELF: "What is the one thing we can do..." ?  
When you replace „ME“ with „WE“ you will start getting into consideration more external influences and  stop thinking just about  „how can I get better even it means someone will get into bad place“. 
Critical thinking is the ability to think clearly and rationally about what to do or what to believe. It includes the ability to engage in reflective and independent thinking. Someone with critical thinking skills is able to do the following : 

  • understand the logical connections between ideas 
  • identify, construct and evaluate arguments 
  • detect inconsistencies and common mistakes in reasoning 
  • solve problems systematically 
  • reflect on the justification of one's own beliefs and values 

Everyone knows ( or think) how to give a good/fine/acceptable feedback so none gets hurt. 
Everything is in the hands of receiver.  
The story you tell about feedback you get, tells much about you. 50% of our reaction comes from our DNA, 40% how we tell the story of things which are said to us and 10% is reality ( how things really are said to us). 

2 things will help us grow our boundaries of „I know the best“ and start helping ourself and people around us.  

Ask yourself: 
Am I ready to listen?  

When we talk about being ready to listen means; not starting conversation with predetermined attitude but, stay open cause things always can get better.  

Start thinking about yourself as a flame. If you want your flame to grow or even stay the way it is now, you have to „feed“ it with new woods. If you stop feeding it, it will shut down. 
You are the flame. And you have to invest very good wood to light up the space.  
So listen to the people, appreciate good critics, ignore those which do not help you but at the end say “Thank you“ and do what is in your power. Your actions influence others and you, as a team, infulence the company growth. 
Make sure you understand everything what was said to you. You won’t be able to improve if you don’t understand what’s wrong, so be sure to request clarifications or ask questions if you have any. Asking questions also shows that you want to improve and get the task right next time.  

  • Make sure to ask questions in a positive and specific way. 
  • Don't be afraid to ask for suggestions. You could ask "How can I do this better next time?" 


It maybe sounds crazy, but you should ask for criticism on a regular basis.  WHY?

You will start to perceive it as  help (which is its primarily purpose) . Instead of people coming to you to tell you what’s wrong, you can go to them first and ask, even if everyone seems happy with your work. 

And remember; 

Vivere tota vita discendum est! (you learn your whole life).  


Author: Anita Vuzem